What defines you?

One thing that I enjoy in life is human connections. It is beautiful to meet people from all walks of life and hear their stories. You start to appreciate how each individual is different and have their own perspective in life. This difference in opinions usually comes with traditional Chinese and Western cultures.

One of the pillars in a traditional Chinese family structure is filial piety and we are taught that our parents knows best. So, what if your way of life differs from your parents as you grow and find your own place in this world? What if you want to break out of the cycle of family traditions?

The concept of filial piety is a value based on strict principles like obedience and obligations, does that mean you are unfilial when you disagree with some of their beliefs? I am not talking about rebellion or disrespect to your parents, I am speaking about the challenge of individuality in some traditional Chinese families because of the belief that your family defines you.

Taking on the amazing responsibility of being a parent is sacrificial and unconditional. Parents who are selfless and fearlessly encouraging and supporting their child to pursue what they love are so inspiring. They are secure with their core and do not feel the need to be right all the time, they feel the need to understand and connect with their child and respect them as an individual.

What spurred me to write this post was because I am seeing an increasing amount of parents engrossed with their devices when they’re with their child having a meal. The disconnect feels cold to me and I can’t help but wonder if the kid is going to do the same someday.

Human connection is a beautiful thing and it is most beautiful between a parent and a child. Understand them, spend quality time with them and give them the freedom to bloom into wonderful individuals to reach their fullest potential. Instead of trying to define them with your own ideals, give them the comfort and confidence to learn and define themselves. The only way to achieve that, is to first define yourself.

With Love,
Location: Singapore

Eve Tan
Eve Tan


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