I am deeply moved and very encouraged by the responses from my first post. Especially for some of you who came forward and acknowledged my writing. It takes a lot to speak your mind and I would like to share more on the events I been through prior.
At the low points of my brand, I felt like I lost a part of myself to the pressure around me. A part of me knew that I had to let go of the brand, but I held on to it as long as I could because I thought I had an emotional attachment to it. but it was simply me not admitting that I’ve failed (As mentioned in my first post). After which I decided to let go of everything and move forward. I realised that the pressure that I felt were mainly external. I did not put myself in front of the business, but behind every other’s opinion and expectations of it.
Taking a second chance to build a new business, I was motivated to move and create again with a refreshed mind and a new perspective. However, a family issue came up during this time and threw me off course. I did not want to be affected by it but I was. My ideas became milder and safer and designing stopped. I was getting impatient and wanted to rush into the new launch with a denial that it was going to be special. I knew if I rushed through the launch, I would regret it and it would not have been fair for anybody if I did not live up to my own expectations. I stepped back. This decision was not easy for me as I always thought at 29, I would be able to handle personal issues with a good head on my shoulders but I knew I had to take time out for myself and regroup my thoughts and emotions. This was entering the third quarter of 2015.
In the midst of all these, a friend of mine, Andrew, contacted me that he needed help with logistics for a volunteer trip in Cambodia.
After the trip, I realised that the pressure I felt from my problems were mainly self-created. The problems which I thought were impossible to solve, was just an excuse not to change. What I saw in Cambodians was strength and resilience toward their problems and from that, they found a way to make peace with it and take action. Every problem in the world can be handled with grace if we can look through it to God. Life is simple and will always be, we just have our way to complicate it to make believe that we are more if we have more.
This perspective created a much needed change within me that made me feel vulnerable yet strong-willed. The resolve to achieve my goals in life overshadowed my vulnerabilities at this point.
In the eyes of the unaware, the journey of self awareness can be seen as lost, lonely or even selfish. However, we all have our own perception towards self awareness and that innate desire to understand oneself should never be overshadowed by status quo.
So through my blog, I wish to shout out to like-minded individuals who are scattered all over the world in their own pursuit of life and peace. That even when we’re going through it alone, we are definitely not lonely.
I would love to hear your story! Here’s my email: email@example.com.
“Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it”- Psalm 34:14
Location: Chiang Mai, Thailand
P.S.: Temperatures dropped to as low as 11Degrees here in Chiang Mai. Definitely not packed for this. So did other backpackers it seems. One of them said “I’m wearing everything I brought”. Mother earth is indeed going a little bonkers.